Tuesday, March 1, 2011

OMG The Jeanie Blogged

“Ahem!” the noise from The Jeanie’s imaginary audience quiets to silence.

“I stand here before you to…oops, wrong speech…one moment please” the imaginary audience waits patiently as The Jeanie swipes her hand across the virtual screen on her super computer (think Minority Report) before finding the correct speech.

“Hello my minions” pause for adulation, continue. “I am here on the Jeanie and Jayha blog to speak some small truths” pause for awed exclamations, continue.

“I have many issues I would like to cover, but today it will be, but one” Look at imaginary audience, which is made up of HOT ASS men whom are all half naked.

“What I will talk about today is this: Why The Jeanie is annoyed at the fact there are too many movies adapted to film that suck so much they are creating a filmic black hole in the universe.” Pause for a round of ‘Yeahs!’ to subside.

“As both an Author and a Scriptwriter, I find it offensive when I have read the book and get excited at its excellence, only to have my good times dashed when the movie sucks all kinds of ass!” wait as imaginary audience of hot ass half naked men all make sounds of agreement.

“I mean…come on people! You get paid wayyyyyyyy to fucking much and more often than not you have the author of the book/story readily available and somehow you still manage to make a suck ass film, which would serve us better if you buried it so far up your pompous greedy ass, that you’d be shitting celluloid for the next fifty years!” ‘Here here!’ is heard through-out the audience listening so intently.

“Now I have a solution…” pause for effect, every imaginary audience member leans forward in their seats, anticipation written all over their handsome faces. “Allow The Jeanie, Fearless Leader and their fellow Beautiful Trouble counterparts to take over the world therefore better films will be adapted from books/stories.”

Cue: THUNDEROUS APPLAUSE and FISTS IN THE AIR!

“The Jeanie has spoken”

11 comments:

Shara Azod said...

I think I am stuck on half naked men- but yes they do suck do they not? Color me impressed.

Mercifully,
Shara

Shara Azod said...

Oh yeah, and take over the world? It's not already ours?

JayhaLeigh said...

[Jayha looks around for an approaching Extinction Level Event to explain The Jeanie blogging]. Seeing none, she gets all veclempt. Wow, speechless. You blogged. Wow. Wow. Wow. And BTW, fist in the air.

Dréa riley said...

ahhhhhhhhh ha haha ha ha ha
YAY...ok if i get buried in snow or something really odd like that its your fault all this blogging from you and jay is killing me LOL

Janet Eckford said...

Can I have the job of security. I feel it's imperative that everyone's safety is closely monitored when world domination happens. Just because they're half naked doesn't mean they don't need to be strip searched.

Great blog by the way;)

Beautiful Trouble Publishing said...

@shara, of course you'd be stuck on half-naked men...and yes the world is already ours but we can always make it more ours;
@myself, you are so awesome jayha...so so very awesome
@drea, we're allowed as the jeanie would say
@janet, lmmfao...half-naked men still need to be strip-searched.

Serenity King said...

LMBO! This is so funny! I still say all of you ladies are just crazy, hehehe. OMG! Jeanie you ROCK! As the voice of reason, NONE of you should be allowed to take over the world...y'all would be the only ones left in it...LMBO!

Love you ladies! Great blog!

Anonymous said...

*hearing thunder in the distance* The pantheon of shit starters have all gathered together...
Hide the children, strap down anything that can be moved and let the awesomeness begin...
*I will be sitting back and observing with 3D glasses*

AuthorGuru Novellette said...

Oh wow! I thoroughly enjoyed that and it is so true.
I've reached the point where I don't even bother watching the movie if I've read the book.

Jeanie Johnson said...

Thank you ladies! Of course I'm shocked that anyone would be veclempt that I, THE Jeanie, would blog...I blog all the time...LMAO...ok I couldn't keep a straight face with that one! But my thanks is sincere!
Love y'all!
THE Jeanie :)

Jeanie Johnson said...

Oh look at that...does a comment count as blogging? If so, I have blogged TWICE in one month...woo hoo! :)

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